Baby, my little sweety, mommy’s little girl. baby doll,I love you. Mommy loves you so much baby, and I miss you dearly. You were my best friend. Buddy was my best friend too; when you first came home to join our family, you were a cute little girl. You first slept in Jamie’s room and you would wimper, like puppies do, when they miss their mommy’s. Buddy was mommy’s boy; he was my special boy. I loved him with all my heart too. Spot was older, but you all learned to love each other and became close loving, playful family friends. You and bud would always be playing.
One time we took you and Buddy to Berkley Island, one of Buddy’s favorite places to go. I would throw sticks in the water and both of you would swim out to get them. One time you swam too far, and Buddy swam out and brought you back. Buddy loved to walk in the water. I think he liked the water on his back, but after he came out,he went crazy from the flies biting him. You, Buddy and Spot were three loving companions in one happy, lucky family, and all the cats we had. One Buddy would always know when it was time for bed; he would sleep next to my bed, always walking down the hallway when we would go to sleep. Then one day I wasn’t home all day, and I believe Buddy knew something was wrong, and Jamie said Buddy was laying on my bed all day, and that wasn’t like him. That night I came home, my little boy collaped on the floor from heart failure. My whole world came to a hault. Without buddy, I was alone; he was my world, my everything, my little boy and little man who was with me till the end.
I was crushed, devastated,and so lost without him. After time went by we got angel; you and she played, became good friends and were good together, but Angel was too hyper for me to handle.I loved her too, and I feel bad, because we could not keep her, but ended up adding Rocky and Mariah to the family, and then Hailey. Boy did you all love one another; you were inseparable. As you were with me sweet girl, you loved Berkey Island too like Buddy, Dudley Park Beachwood, car rides, where you would love to stand in between the two front seats and watch where you would be going; you loved it and I loved taking you.
You were so much fun baby, remember Drum Point School with Kara riding her bike? You were there too and the slide with Laney at the park. The walks, the rides to Shoprite, when I would sit with you in the car and you would sit in the passenger seat like a human being looking at all the surroundings, alway’s wanting mommy to rub under your sweet little arms. When I stopped you would put your arm up again for me to do it again. I will always miss you baby, all the places we went together, did together, all the happy, loving times and lives we shared.
You are such a big big part of my life and everyone at home. You will always be mommy’s sweet girl and all of our girl baby doll. I miss hearing you come down the hallway, like Buddy, I even knew your walk, with every step you took, I knew it was you.I even opened the door before you scratched on it. How you would sleep in our room at night, and when I was asleep you went back on the couch, and in the morning, if I didn’t get up at a certain time, you would come and put your paw on me to get me up and I would say sometimes, baby stop go to bed. You would go back out again for a while, and then come back, and paw me again and then you would whine alittle till I got up. Baby you gave me so much happiness and a big reason to get up every day and give me so much to be happy and comfort for.
You were there for me when Buddy, Spot and Timmy and Peppy died. You were and will always be my everything mommy’s sweet liitle girl. I never ever thought we would ever be apart. You would always want to be with me; you wanted nothing else in the world than to be with me, as I did with you. You always made sure mommy and daddy had to be together in order for you to go for a walk. You are amazing baby; you were unique,and so so special and the best girl any mommy could ever want. I love you baby, you always remember that sweetie, the shock we got to hear the dreadful sickness you had, ripped my life apart. My heart sank, because without you, my world is turned upside down, and so sad, empty.
I hope and pray you were not in pain; I hope we did the right thing for you. I would never let you stay in pain sweet girl; you were off and on. There was no way, I could let you go into surgery and hope for the best, and it would turn out to be the worst. I could of never of not seen you again or you see me. I could not do that, but also we thought you could be helped my sweet girl. We did not know the badness of it until days later. Then the doctor said you could go home, but for us to watch the quality of your precious life that was hard, because there was no way I would let you suffer sweet girl. You were still doing everything you loved and eating and drinking and took all your medicine, right up until the day after your staples came out and when we were there and they came to get you, to take out the staples, you looked back at me twice as if you were asking me is it ok mommy?And I said it’s ok baby go ahead and you did.
After that to my surprise Christian told me you threw up down stairs and the back porch, at first I didn’t believe or didn’t want to believe it was from you. The next morning I put Laney on the bus, when I left the house, you were laying on your bed next to my bed, just laying there. You lifted your head alittle and layed your head back down, and your head was hanging over the blanket. You didn’t look comfortable at all. I put my pillow under your pretty little head, and I left.
After Laney got on the bus, I went for a ride on my bike, You layed there, and I for over an hour. I came back up the driveway usually you would be smiling at the door with Rocky, Mariah and Hailey. I asked daddy how’s baby, and he said not good. Somehow you had trouble breathing after trying to climb on Jamie’s bed. They said you were having trouble breathing. You were laying next to the front door; you looked up to me, and were panting hard. I called the vet and I told them you were having a hard time breathing and could not even move. Only a few days before your doctor wasn’t in. I tried to call him, because I was worried about you and didn’t want you to suffer. Your vet wasn’t there and I called Toms River vet, and I told them how worried I was, so worried that I was going to bring you there, where you were spayed. When I was talking to the lady at the vet you sprang up from under the table and walked around like you were you again. I didn’t know what to do baby; the lady said, give you the weekend and see how you are.
Monday Oct 3rd is when the staples were taken out and Tuesday morning, Oct 5th is when I lost you. It killed me to loose you baby, my heart broke to see you go. I love you little girl, Mommy love you. I love you baby, remember mommy would always say that to you, because I do sweet girl. God bless you always. May God bring us together again through eternity. I love you babyxoxoxoxoxgoodby sweet girl, goodby, I love and miss you.
Mommy loves you baby I love you.
| Baby |
| 4, Oct 2011 |
| Deborah and Joseph Rawlins |