Penny came to me on February 17, 2000. Very pregnant. The minute our eyes met, that was it. We both felt an instant connection. Penny was a Springer Spaniel and the light of my life. She was literally in the back seat of my car where ever I went. No matter what, she had to be with me. I was working 3rd shift at an AFC home, and
I took her to work with me every night.
The ladies that I took care of just loved her, and the love was returned by her. When I would wake them up in the morning, she would stay in the bedrooms until they were up. She would stand in front of them until they said “good morning” to her. She would always con them out of their breakfast, but she always did it when I wasn’t looking! The ladies made sure I wasn’t looking before they would give her a bite.
Ten days after I got her, she had puppies. I have never in my life seen such a good momma! My sisters stayed with her while I was working, and she had the first 5 while I was at work. She literally waited until I got home to have number 6. I remember watching her and her staring at me while she was pushing, and I was crying so hard. I promised her that night she would never have to go through that pain again. She allowed her puppies to nurse on her until they were 9 weeks old. No matter how many times I got them off of her, she would lay down and let them nurse. As I got rid of each puppy, she went with me. I would hold each one up to her, and she would give them one last kiss on the head.
One of my memories of my Penny was when I was having my carpets cleaned and she was supposed to stay the night at my mom’s. My mom called me at 7 am, and told me that I had to come get her. When I asked why, my mom told that Penny had paced the house literally all night. Every time that the door was opened, she ran out and when she got to the end of my mom’s walkway, she stopped and looked both ways, and then back at my mom as if to say,
“Where’s my momma?”
Penny had very severe skin allergies, and was on steroids twice. The second time that she was on them, they did not help. When I took her to the vet, I knew that I probably would have to have her put to sleep, but I just was not ready to let go. The vet said that we could try the steroids for a third time, but most likely they wouldn’t work, because the second round did not help. When he was telling me what few options I had, I glanced at Penny,and she just looked so miserable. I knew then what I had to do. I asked the vet for time alone with her to say goodbye. When the vet came back in, I told him that we were ready. He gave the shot while I was hugging her and telling her how much I loved her. She just went to sleep. My Penny was gone.
I literally started hyperventilating.
I felt the same way when she was gone that I felt when I was told that my sister was gone. I have always felt that Penny was sent to me by my sister, because she looked after me the same way my sister always did.
The one thing I remember about Penny was when she would just come up to me while I was sitting on the couch, she would lay her head on my lap and just stare at me. I could just see the love in her eyes,and I knew that she could see the same love in mine. I have her picture in a frame on my computer desk, and when I look at that picture, I can still see the love in her eyes. When I am driving, I can hear her in the backseat behind me panting like she always did when she rode in the backseat.
To this day, I wonder if I should not have tried another round of steroids, but then I realize that I would not have wanted my “baby girl” to go through that misery any longer.
It still feels like yesterday that I lost her.
I guess that wound will never heal.
My one consolation in losing Penny is that I know she is at the “Rainbow Bridge” waiting for me.
To my Penny-Jean:
Gone but never, ever forgotten.
Love,
Momma
| Penny |
| 23, Aug 2000 |
| Miranda Lester |