Max was our wedding gift to each other 12 years ago. My life was enchanted then. I was a professional violinist in a symphony, and married to a doctor, with few worries in my world. As life happened, and divorce drew near, one of the first things I said was, “I’m keeping the dogs.”
At first I tried desperately to replace my husband. Quickly, or maybe not quick enough, I learned that boyfriends and husbands come and go, but, Max, he was always by my side. I told Max many times as I snuggled him, “thank you for staying with me, thank you for being my good dog, and for being so…”Max-like”.
How many gloves, slippers, bike shorts, wallets, bras, mittens, “important” documents, wrapped Christmas gifts, designer shoes, and even money had to be replaced because they were eaten by my irreplaceable Max.
Max and his brother Niska were my inspiration, and gave me the courage to change my life. I needed to have a plan, to become independent, to be strong enough on my own to take care of the real loves of my life—my two dogs, and my cat Hobbes, too.
And the spectrum of the things that I have seen, and done. But I always came home to optimism. I will never forget Max’s rich brown eyes—how looking into them comforted me and made my heart melt. I loved running my fingers
through his thick fur.
I can’t say Max never asked for anything, because he did. He asked that I take him to fun places, to play in the sun, and in the mud. To dance like no one is watching. To swim in the lake with no destination, and wrestle until I giggled as he proudly sat on top me, as if to show who won.
Max taught me that sometimes, forgiveness
can free your spirit.
He demanded me to smile. He made me have love in my heart, and he insisted that I be happy, simply because we were together.
On busy hectic days, especially when I was trying to get ready for work, I think Max dared me not to pet his furry golden tummy while he lay in front of my path with a smile on his face.
It was clear, who needed who—
who took care of who.
How beautiful, and a noble your soul is, Max. I’m so sad without you. But, I won’t forget that I have to play, and have fun, and see the potential for goodness in everything.
Thank you for making my heart laugh
when my gut was crying.
Thank you for always protecting me, and watching over me while I tended to my garden, even though you ate many plants, flowers and trees, that are all better off left unmentioned.
Thank you for keeping me up at night because you were “warning” me that thunder was coming. Now the storms catch me off guard.
Thank you for looking at me,
and not looking away until I pet you.
Thank you for stealing those hotdogs, I laughed so hard….I’m glad you didn’t burn your tongue on the BBQ.
Thank you for eating the music to my Beethoven Symphony. Some things are meant to be played by heart.
Thank you for introducing me to the slow saunter around the block. How many more people did we meet that way. How many kids said Hi Max, and stopped
to pet your luxurious coat.
Thank you for showing me that we cannot always walk on some kinds of surfaces. And there’s no shame in asking for a little help from those who love us.
Thank you for teaching me that even if you never saw someone you knew ever again, that it was good to somehow let them know that they touched your life.
Thank you for being my friend.
Thank you for making me try
to be better than I am. For you.
Max you have mended my broken heart many times. Even just before you died in my arms, you looked right into my teary eyes and tried one last time to get me through the hardest thing I’ve ever faced. I want you to know that it was you who brought joy and happiness and meaning to my life. And that everyone who knew you, loved you.
For the life we shared together,
you will always be in my heart.
Niska and I will continue this journey with dignity, and remember your love,
what you meant to us,
and what you taught us.
I miss you, my beautiful friend.
I love you.
With Love,
| Max |
| 12, Sep 2007 |
| Teresa Curtis |