It’s December, and as I type, I remember that this was your birthday month. Had you been able to stay with me, you would be 13 now. How I wish that you were still here. I miss you so very much.
I’ve been thinking of the way you grew. You were such a cute little puppy when you first came to live with me. You were full of mischief and energy, and nothing was exactly safe around you.
Remember the mini-blinds. I still laugh about the two missing ends that you chewed. Remember the box springs on my bed. By the time you finished your “remodel” job, you had removed all of the cotton from beneath the bed!
You grew into quite the watch dog. You would bark with everything you had when you thought someone was coming into your yard or walking on “your” street. I found out from friends that you would never bark if I wasn’t at home.
As you got older, you mellowed a lot. You stopped looking at everyone in cowboy boots as if he or she was one of the bad guys. You remembered for many years that someone had been mean to you and that he had worn cowboy boots.
I also remembered the other day how much you would hate it if someone said “bad dog.” You would immediately go get into your crate. Speaking of crates, do you remember how upset you would get over a suitcase until you saw that your crate was also by the front door?
I remember how you would sit on the back of the sofa and watch for me out the picture window.
Bingo, there was never a time when I didn’t love you. There was never a time when I thought of what it would be like to not have you. I think I believed we would always be together.
The past seven months have been so painful. You must know that I have little Fritzie now. I think you sent him my way because you didn’t want me to be lonely. He’s wonderful. Thank you so much for knowing what I need before I do.
You have such a big and warm place in my heart. You were the first dog that I never had to share with anyone. You were my baby, and you knew that. You knew that I adored you.
We lived so well together. You and I were a pair. We were a package deal, and our friends knew it.
Last year at Christmas you and I spent time with Mark, Mia and Jaden. You, Happy, Suni and Doogie were outside a lot. I’ll go there again this year, but I’ll go alone. Fritz has to go to the kennel because he’s too little to be around the other dogs. It’s not going to be the same.
I think of you all the time. I will still call Fritz by your name. I feel badly when I do that because I do love him. It’s just that it’s very hard to break a 12 year old habit.
Bingo, thank you for choosing to live your life with me. You were the one who made the choice that day in February, 1992. You stole my heart, and never once was I not grateful that you did.
I remember as you aged, your eyes became clouded. You reached a point where I would have to pick you up to put you on the bed. You soon could no longer sleep on your back because the tumor in your throat caused you to be unable to breathe in that position.
You were a fighter. You were a warrior. You never complained. You never acted sick. You were the bravest little girl in the world. You had dignity and honor. You taught me so much.
Bingo, we’ll be together again. We don’t know when. I’ll look for you. I know I’ll see a little white dog flying across the beautiful fields to get me at Rainbow Bridge. Please, please give me a great big Bingo kiss. I miss you so much, baby girl.
I will always love you, Baby Girl!
| Charlotte Hayes |