My mom found a ad in the newspaper that said free puppies to give away to good home. I thought “we have a good home”. And we were off. It was April 1991 and I was 11 years old and about to meet my second dog. Dinkie, the dog I remember from “as early as I can recall” passed away earlier that year. I don’t remember much of that car ride but for the fact that we went down south a bit from Joliet IL. There she was…a beautiful black and white curly little dog. She was still there at her mom’s house with some other brothers and sisters. I remember how she ran when we got her outside. I thought she ran faster that anything I had ever seen. We picked out one of the girls and hoped that we found the sweetest little one there. What an underestimation of the truth! On the way home, my mom held her and told us her name: Cassie. I had trouble remembering it, I just knew it rhymed with Lassie.
She ran and ran in our back yard that night after we got her. She would chase me around our pool and bite my pants leg. My brothers friends came over and she chased them up to the point of the fence when they tried to climb over. The first few nights, she slept in the kitchen and we barricaded her in and gave her a box to sleep in. I gave her some of my toys including a shoe and a blue caterpillar. Over the next few months, Cassie proceeded to chew up the kitchen linoleum. We needed to replace it anyway. Cassie was the center of attention when it came to me and my brother. All of our friends loved her and she tried to play with us outside with balls and running around.
We connected big time, and I don’t know when it really happened. Cassie became my “sister and best friend”. She slept in my bed and as I got older I took her for walks. In 1993 after I got back from Florida, Cassie must have had fleas and spread them to my bed. I woke up with so many flea bites. I did not let her sleep with me for awhile after that.
But she forgave me.
I think that dogs are here to over joy our lives. Cassie was my pride and joy. Some of my best childhood memories contain her in them. One special day comes to mind where Cassie and I went for a walk to the fields by Richland, my grade school. There was a baseball game going on and I don’t even know why I stopped to watch. Cassie stood by me and waited patiently while I watched the game. A little kid came up and wanted to pet Cassie. She was so darn beautiful at these times. She would be so excited and then when the initial excitement wore off she would just sit and let the people pet her like she got bored of them already. Another beautiful memory in my heart is Cassie running in the fields. Her ears would fly back, she would be running so fast that it looked like she was floating. She would always head for a certain tree. The freedom she felt just reflected off of her and right into my heart.
Cassie gave sneak attack hugs and kisses. I would be sitting watching TV and pow, she jumped up on me. Cassie would set her paws on my shoulder and let me hug her. What she really wanted was to give kisses. She loved to lick especially if my skin tasted salty after sweating or crying. I would tear up at a sad movie and she would jump right at me to lick my tears. She was something else…that girl. If I wasn’t giving her attention, she would whine at me to get your attention especially
if I was on the internet.
Cassie loved food, especially anything you happened to be eating. But her favorites were eggs and popcorn. She got to where she knew those words. She always deserved a special treat because she continually brightened my life and made my world worth living. As I got older, Cassie and I grew more connected. One time when I came home from Florida, Cassie was outside when I got in. My mom would yell to her that “Kris is home”. I was already in my bedroom yelling for her. She would run inside like a streak of lightning and bolt around looking for me. At this moment I caught her on camera. When I look at that picture I see an amazing being who was so happy to just hear my name. I saw pure joy on her face and I knew the feeling was mutual.
Going away to college was the saddest thing I have ever done. I had to leave this little girl who loved me so much and was my best friend. I came home every weekend to see her. At night when I slept in my own bed, I would tuck Cassie in with me and tell her how much I loved her. I told her that she was my heart and would live on in my heart forever.
There are many sides to a story. And everyone has a story to tell with their own interpretation of a tale. Some time in 2001, Cassie had a vet checkup which revealed some extra fluid around her heart. Well thankfully she was able to get medication to help that. But then it was discovered that she had kidney disease. And she started to become finicky as far as eating her own food. She was not a young dog anymore; I noticed her activity level went down and I just thought that she was getting old. My parents would mix baby food with her dog food. Cassie probably felt that for once in her life, she was eating good food. She loved it!
At some point we realized that the sodium in the baby food was not helping Cassie too much, in fact she was probably worse off because of it. We took it away and Cassie started to go downhill. She did not want the special diet food we gave her. She started to get dehydrated and the vet put her on fluids. My mom had to give her fluids by inserting a needle in her skin and letting it in. She laid around all day, but I still saw the young girl come out, my best friend, when I came home. She may have been starting to suffer but she still had so much love to give.
I still cry one year and about 3 months later when I think of the last time I saw her. I was home unexpectedly on a Saturday for a few hours. It was a lovely July day and I carried Cassie outside and sat on a porch swing with her in my lap. She settled down and accepted my love as we rocked. I told her that I loved her and I would always. I went back to school a few hours later.
Cassie was put to rest on July 24th, 2002. I was at a friends house swimming and having a good time and studying for finals. It was a Wednesday I believe. I finished finals on July 26th, 2002 and walked back to my apartment on a high ready to go home. My dad was in my living room waiting for me with tears in his eyes. My parents had kept a hard secret from me for 2 days and my dad did not want to wait any longer keeping me in the dark. I just cried and cried. They told me that on Tuesday night, Cassie was not well, and barely moving. My mom took some pictures of her that day. That night my mom wanted to give Cassie a blanket to snuggle in. She gave her my blanket because she felt Cassie would smell me and sleep well. According to my mother, she stayed on it all night. The next morning, Cassie would not move much, my mother thought she may have had a stroke. So the inevitable happened, my baby went to the Rainbow Bridge.
When I go home I bring this picture of Cassie with me to set by my bed. I cuddle up in the blanket she last slept on and I have her with me as much as can be in spirit. I think it was fate that led me home that last day I held Cassie. She tried to give me closure. I know I will see her again. She is patiently waiting for me to live out my life. And when I see her I will wrap her in my arms and be complete once again…
My heart
| Cassie |
| Kristen |