My precious girl Ebony, it is one week today since you passed. I had another dream about you last night and woke up crying at 3:00am this morning. Oh, honey I hurts so bad. I miss your sounds, your smell your touch…everything about you. I kept thinking if I’d done a better job I would have had you longer. Well, I have done some extensive research and feel better knowing the life span of a Lab is 11-13 years. I feel fortunate to have had you for 11 1/2 of those precious years. I’ve read many tributes since you passed, and it is very sad that many people did not get to enjoy their beloved pet for as long as I enjoyed you.
When I woke up Saturday morning April 21, and found you laying on your side with labored breathing and that glazed look in your beautiful eyes I knew something was terribly wrong. When I rushed you to the doctor I had no idea it would end up being our goodbye. The doctor wanted to run some tests on you so we would know what the next step would be. He told me to go home and he would call me within a couple of hours with the results. I thought you would be treated and be able to come home with me soon. I got a call about 45 minutes later and the doctor told me when they started you on the IV fluids and began to prepare you for x-rays you went into cardiac arrest. The doctor called told me I needed to get back there immediately, as he didn’t think you would make it. The x-rays showed a mass inside your tummy. I felt like it was my fault for not knowing sooner, but he said there would have been no way to tell. We had fun at doggie park last week, and I will never forget that.
I have been crying since that morning. I miss you so very much my beauty! Thank you forever for the 11 1/2 marvelous years my angel. My heart is broke in half and I can hardly think straight. I feel lost, and there is a huge void where my precious lady Ebony use to lay. Oh my Lord please help me…I am hurting so bad! The grief is unbearable. I was numb and in disbelief that you would be taken from me so abruptly, and now it is sinking in that you are really gone. I didn’t know you were sick until it was too late.
When Doctor Guardo looked at me and said, “She is very ill, and I think you know what we need to do”, I lost it. I am sorry I had to make that decision honey, but it was so you would not suffer. Just before you took your last breath, you raised your head up a bit and looked directly into my eyes, as if you were telling me goodbye. That picture of your pretty face will stay in my mind forever until we are together again.
My heart and arms ache for you. If something should happen to me along the way, I will surely come to where you are. You will always be kept close in my girl. You were so beautiful, and such a special dog. I thank God for giving me the honor to know you, and for your gift of unconditional love. Thank you for allowing me to be to be your mom. You were a perfect dog! Watch for me in heaven baby. Until we meet again my luv, tell the angels hello. Forever, even after……Mommy.
Run across heaven's fields like you did at doggie park....with much love,
| EBONY |
| 21, Apr 2007 |
| CAROLE TURNER |