Dec. 1 2001
Cat
My mom my stepdad my brother and I lived in a house in the country.
From the day we moved in there were cats every where.
Most of them were “river cats” (similar to alley cats).
They all came and went with a few sticking around for a while.
We also had one indoor cat and one in-and-out cat.
One day there was this cat that started sitting in the trees next to our house.
She would just cry and cry but would never come near us.
It wasn’t like she was hurt or anything.
It seemed like she just wanted attention
but was afraid to come to close.
One night my brother was throwing a party.
I was sitting on the porch with one of his friends
when Gabby started her crying.
I just wanted her to come close enough to pet
so I called her over but she didn’t want to come.
So I gave it up and began talking.
The next thing I knew this extremely fat cat which was apparently Gabby
(I had never seen her up close before) hopped right up into my friend’s lap.
We both petted her and from that day on she lived on our porch.
I would talk to her about everything and she would always converse back
(hence the name Gabby).
My mom wouldn’t allow me to bring her in the house
because “we already had enough cats”…
but when she wasn’t home Gabby would be in there with me.
She always demanded attention.
If I wasn’t petting her every second she would pat my cheek with her paw.
If I still didn’t pet her she would rub her head against my chin….
sometimes a little too hard…
The only time she would just lay there peaceful was
when I would be practicing my flute.
She just loved the music.
About a month before I graduated from high school
we were forced to move out of our house.
Our new house was on a main road and there were too many people around.
So my mom and I elected to take Gabby down to my stepdad’s mechanic’s garage.
The guys down there immediately fell in love with the cat
and I was sure she would be safe.
I graduated high school and that summer flew by.
I visited her as much as I could she seemed just as happy there.
I soon went away to study to become a professional flutist.
I often came back to see my cats.
I began to notice that Gabby was loosing weight.
The once fat cat had bones sticking out all over the place.
My stepdad noticed that she would eat mainly on the days I was home.
I figured as time went on the hungrier she got the more she would eat.
I was right but she didn’t gain weight at all.
She got skinnier. She began becoming really sick.
I came home every weekend and spent countless hours with her.
One weekend I was really worried about her.
She was really lethargic and wasn’t talking to me as much.
I took my mom to see her that night
and we decided to take her to the vet first thing in the morning.
I rushed out of there,
just wanting morning to come so Gabby could begin to feel better.
It’s something I’m going to regret for a really long time.
My last night with her she followed me around with whatever
strength she could muster but I just left.
I got a phone call from my stepdad the next morning… Gabby was dead.
She passed away in her sleep the night before.
All the precious cat had wanted to do was just sit on my lap and sleep
but I was too impatient. I should have let her.
Maybe then she wouldn’t have died alone in that garage.
I know she knew that I love her but she shouldn’t have died alone.
If I had just taken a little bit of time to let her rest on my lap
she would have gone in the arms of the person
who loved her the most instead of alone.
It’s only been a few days since it happened..
but I can’t do anything but think of her and cry.
She should have gone to the vet weeks ago but I was at school and
just thought she would get over whatever was wrong.
She never seemed to be in any pain.
But to die alone is the worst…
Gabby…. I love you with all my heart.
You loved me and my music even more than I could ever love you.
You left your paw prints on my heart and they’ll never go away.
You can never ever be replaced.
I’m so sorry. I miss you.
I would give anything to have you back….
Sarah
| Gabby |