My dog of 11+ years Q died yesterday, and I just needed to share my grief in some way. He was my companion for so many years of sunrise walks, mountain hikes, and camping in the Catskills as a pup and the Rockies afterwards.
Every day when I’d arrive home he’d welcome me with barks and a special prancing that only those who were fortunate enough (or not, reasonable people who’ve watched him can think oppositely) have experienced it. Well, he no longer barks and prances, or can enjoy his walks. The look in his eyes, the wobble in his walk, and his loss of appetite helped me to realize that the inevitable time was here. It is so strange how recent it seems that Jan saw him in a pet store on 72nd street in February of 1995, in the big dog pen because he wasn’t scooped up at Christmas time, this 4 month old red husky. She told me to go check him out, and I walked out of the store and into a taxi with him.
Now 11 years later I need to let him go. The decision to let something go that you love is the most difficult and painful I’ve ever experienced. He could live another week, or even another month. But that would not be the love for him…it would be myself that I would be taking care of to keep him here. So I let go. The house is quiet, the water bowl sits very still, the dog door does not flap, there is no one to whistle to or pet or have lick my face hello.
There is great sorrow in my heart today.
Love Forever,
| Q |
| 31, July 2006 |
| Joshua Sroge |