In Memory of Sasha.. At 8 weeks she was so cute. I wanted to hold her so much but she always hated being held. When she was older she begin to notice me and from then on we became good friends. We communicated in so many ways. With looks and words and carefully timed barks sniffs and pokes. More then once she left me to stare after her in amazement after she methodically made sure I was aware of something important. She was wise and brave. Sasha would never run and hide when I was upset. She’d just lie there on her pillow and give me her best “you’re being ridiculous” look. Then there was that “expectant” look she’d give when she needed to go out. She would run through the room and if I didn’t follow she’d come around the corner and look at me with these big bright mismatched eyes that said loud and clear “Aren’t you coming?” She was a great traveler quiet and content. Even on bumpy Jeep trails she’d manage to wedge herself upright so she could look out of the window and watch the world speed by. She was the founder of “Mommy’s Fan Club” as she faithfully followed me from room to room. Whenever I would turn around Sasha would be close by. Sometimes when she would wake up her head would pop-up in a panic.. to scan the room from me. And the countless times I would look up and see her peering over the table at me. She made me feel so important. She gave us 15 happy years. With all her intelligent expressions silly antics and discussed “nift’s”. And although those last 2 months were a tearful battle against the inevitable I knew I had been very lucky. We knew this day would come. We tried so hard for her and she knew it. She tried hard for us too. Sasha was a fighter. There was nothing frail about her. But maybe the most special thing of all came the last night she was with us. When she forfeited the comfort of her pillow and struggled over to me on painfully unsteady legs. She let her body fall against my legs. I knelt down to her and she let herself fall into my lap. She wanted me to hold her. My Sasha who hated to be held. She knew all along. She knew I had wanted to hold her just once before she went away. She knew how much I loved her and in her own way she always made sure I knew she loved me too.. I have no guilt and no regrets. Just a loving memory of my Sasha and an experience in my life of something far too wonderful to ever say “never again”.
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Janis
| Sasha |
| 9, February 2000 |
| Janis |