Little Beepy Duchess,
We had 13 years loving years with each other.
Two nights ago was the first thunderstorm without you. I remember I used to run over into the backyard of the VFW Hall, and find you in your “secret hiding place”. I would hold you tight in my arms, and run back to the house before the rain had a chance to soak your beautiful fur. I remembered that time the backyard flooded, and I saw you in the doorway of the garage, wanting to come inside. The thunder was rumbling, and you were scared. I ran through the flood, up to my knees in ice cold water, and I brought you out of harm’s way. You were so thankful for all I did for you. As am I. You gave me a better life, Little Miss Beep. You were all of my childhood memories; you took care of me until I was old enough to be on my own.
In the nighttime, I imagine you are still with me. I can almost feel you in between my legs, sticking me with that one claw, and forcing me off the bed completely. Or those times when you would sneak up near my face, while I was flanked out on the bed. You would use my arm as a pillow, and press all four of your paws against my body. I would wake up at dawn, and see you sleeping so peacefully, and smiling while you dreamed with Mama by your side. Do you remember when I used to sleep past 6:00 a.m.? You were my alarm clock, Beeps. Mom used to get up
at 4:30 every morning, and feed you.
You would hang out on the porch, in your cushioned swing right up until 6:15 a.m. You would run upstairs, jump onto my bed, and stare at me until I sensed you were in the room. I would open my eyes, and smell the catfood on your little kitty lips, and I knew it was time to get up. I would pat you on the head, and I would say, “Be right back, Beepy!”. And you were always so patient.
Watching the CATS musical is not even fun anymore. Do you remember the night before I moved out? We were on my bed, watching CATS. You were facing the TV–watching inventively. I fell asleep just after the Rum Tum Tugger song. I woke up at the very end, when Grizabella was singing “Memory”. I don’t think you knew, but I saw you. Your face was lit up from the blue screen TV, and the picture was reflecting on your eyes. You were snuggled up in my fleece blanket, and you were smiling. I know you knew what she was singing about.
When Deuteronomy walked her up the stairs, you slowly closed your eyes, and fell asleep. I didn’t want to wake you. The moment was too precious.
Mom and Dad miss you so much. Mom can still hear you in the middle of the night, doing your “Brrrrrupppp!” before you jump onto the bed. Dad is saddened that his breathing machine hoses no long have mysterious holes in them! I think Charles sometimes has the flashbacks, also.
Bitey has no one to pick on anymore, and everytime Mumboez smells where you used to rub against, he hangs his head low. We all miss you so much, Beepy. The only thing keeping us going is the wonderful life you blessed us with, and the fact that you are in heaven and at the All-You-Can-Eat buffet for life! We know you own
the refrigerator up there.
It broke my heart when I went down in the basement last month. I never knew how bad you had it, until I saw the evidence. I know if I have the flu for 24 hours, I feel like I want to die. I wish we could have detected your sickness much sooner. Stay safe, my Beep. And please, please wait for me.
I can’t wait to see you again.