You had always been there – you were there before me and countless times have I heard of how you disapproved when I was brought into the house as a new baby. I grew up with you, the most gentle dog I have ever known. I played with you, as an only child you were like a brother to me. But slowly, you were getting older.
You got arthritis when you were 8, and we didn’t expect you to live long after that, but you defied us all. I remember the long walks with you, never seeming to get tired, and always being there to be hugged and to comfort; you always knew when I was sad or in pain.
When you turned 15 and a half, we realized that your life wasn’t going to hold out for much longer, and so we rang up the Golden Retriever Rescue Centre. The woman told us she had a 4 year old bitch just waiting to be adopted, and as soon as we met her we had to keep her. Holly gave you a new lease of life, but about a year ago, we noticed that you couldn’t keep up in the woods any more, and that you got stiff after exercise. We knew that you couldn’t go with Daddy and Holly into the woods, and so you just stayed in the garden.
As time moved on, you became more incontinent as you lost feeling in your back end, but we loved you so much. Then, this christmas, you seemed young again as you tried to open your presents and wore your bow tie all day long. You went to sleep satisfied, and on boxing day morning, we found that you couldn’t move. All day, we hoped that you would get better, but Daddy had to drip water into your mouth on your bed of towels next to the radiator. It was no use, you still hadn’t moved the next day and we decided that if you didn’t pass on in the night we would have to call the vet.
It didn’t happen, and we made an appointment for 11.50. Mummy was worried that you wouldn’t like going to the vets in the car; you never liked going in the car and especially not to the vets, but you didn’t seem to notice. Daddy picked you up with ease, you seemed just to be skin and bones. The trials of time and age had created a shadow of your former self and we knew you were definitely ready to go.
I didn’t go to the vets, I didn’t want to break down in front of everyone, but as I write this the tears are streaming down my cheeks. He shaved your leg, and with just a quick injection you had gone to doggy heaven. I know it was the right thing to do at the grand age of 16 years and 7 months, but I wish I had said goodbye properly. I didn’t want my parents to see me crying, but now I regret that so much, and I regret not going to the vets with you to see your final goodbye to the world. Mummy said you didn’t seem to notice anything, it was quick and painless but I wish I had been there to say goodbye.
I will always miss you, and it hasn’t sunk in that I will never see you again. Goodbye Ben, I miss you so so much and
I will always remember you
Forever and always,
I will love and miss you.
| Ben |
| Vicki |