by Terry

It has been eight months since my beloved “Dinky” left this

world for the greater life beyond. I still cry and mourn and miss him so.

I had him for almost eighteen years so it is very hard to let him go.

I was seriously considering professional help from a bereavement group

or a priest until today.

During these eight months I created many memorials to my baby.

First I found this wonderful website and I thank John Mingo from the

bottom of my heart for all the help is giving to pet lovers.

So I posted a tribute to my baby which can be found in Paw Print #70.

I was destroyed when he passed on and the tribute helped me

memorialize him.

Next I looked for other opportunities to keep Dinky’s memory alive.

I bought an engraved cobblestone which will forever sit in the cobblestone

walk in front of a local municipal building in a town that we lived in.

The inscription reads:

“18 Years of Love

We miss you Dinky

7-2-2000″

Just knowing he has a permanent memorial somewhere that I can visit

from time to time has helped alot. Sometimes I bring a few little flowers

or other small token and place it next to the stone then I sit on the park bench

nearby and remember the good times. I also bought another stone inscribed

with my name and my husband’s names and the years we spent in that

town and it has been placed near Dinky’s stone.

We will be there together forever for all to see nothing will ever separate us.

Shortly after that I purchased another stone that will be in a park in

front of the library of another town we lived in.

This one says:

“Love & Miss You Dinky

Feb. 2 1983 to July 2 2000″

Then I made my own stone for the backyard from a kit I bought

at a craft store. I put little statues of dogs and other small ceramic

animals in the cement along with a tiny ceramic windmill.

I made three stars with a cookie cutter one for each of my babies and

wrote their names one above each star as a permanent memorial of them.

So now I feel that I have done all I could for Dinky’s memory.

I still wasn’t healed and people around me thought I should go for

professional help so the last thing I did was have a heart to heart talk with

Dinky’s spirit in heaven. As I looked at a collage I made of all my three dogs

who have passed over the last 20 years I told Dinky that I loved him

and that my love for him will never die. I told him nothing will change

my love for him and I will meet him in heaven but now it was

time for me to let him go.

After a few days my burden felt lifted and I feel he heard me

and understood that it was time for me to move on with the rest of my life alone.

My other two dogs passed away in 1981 and 1993 so by now I am over the

shock of their deaths but it took many years before I was able to stop crying.

And so it will be with Dinky but I know at some point in time there will be end

to the mourning and I will be laughing and remembering all the funny

little things he did with pleasure instead of pain.

If you have recently lost a pet this is probably all meaningless now

but in time you will find ways to memorialize your pet and finally put

closure to it so you can continue on with your life.

I never replaced a dog we had all of them simultaneously so now that

Dinky was the last one I’d feel like a traitor if we got a new dog.

So for now we will stay without a pet but who knows what the

future will hold. I have offered to pet-sit for all my friend’s dogs

and that will help fill the void without becoming attached to another

dog and having my heart broken again.

Maybe someday God will find a way to put a pet back in my life

but not now it hurts too much it’s too soon.

Much time will have to pass but if a stray should come my way

I don’t think I’ll turn it away. If I’m healed from this hurt I will take it in

and give it a good home knowing that Dinky knows this is not a

replacement for him. No dog could ever replace Dinky.

Oh yes I forgot to tell you I also put a rose for Dinky in the

Candlelight Ceremony on this website. He is in Paw Print #35 for that.

And most recently I submitted a poem about him to the Family Story

section in this website. It is called “Dedicated To Dinky”.

I am writing this entry in the “Reflections of Time” section because now

I feel I might be able to help others with their grief by telling them the path

I followed to help relieve my own grief.

I hope I have helped you with some ideas on how to memorialize

your pet and I wish you luck on your

journey of healing!

Terry