Inky: Today was a very hard and sad day as I had let you go. I remember when I first saw you back in November, you were just a tiny ferel kitten that showed up in my yard. You wouldn’t let me near you but I put out some food and you ate it right away. From that day on you were here everyday for meals and when I put a heated “shanty” outside for you in the winter you stayed in that too.
I don’t know where you came from or how you found me but I guess you decided this was “HOME”. Every morning when it was feeding time you were there waiting. I am so sad I was never able to get close enough to you to give you a pet but I hope in some way you knew you were loved.
You were such a beautiful little grey tiger kitten and so full of life. You had such fun terrorizing my birds and squirrels everyday and climbing trees. When other ferel cats would come to eat you were always trying to make a friend with them, but sadly you always ended up alone.
I feel so guilty as I had noticed your tummy was getting alittle bigger the last week and I was worried you might be going to have kittens but you were just a kitten yourself. You were starting to move slower and not your usual playful self, so I thought about trying to catch you but I was worried I would scare you away, so I didn’t. I feel so guilty and really regret that decision now and just wish I had tried to catch you. I knew something was wrong when you didn’t come for dinner last night and you were not here this AM.
I checked the couple of the other shanties in the woods but you were not there and I was really worried. Later when I went out to feed the birds/squirrels is when I found you laying in my yard in the rain. I ran over to you and you just looked at me and I knew you were in distress. I just scooped you up and got you to the vet. They found you carrying 1 dead kitten and your uterus had ruptured and filled your tummy with fluid. Nothing could be done so I had to make the decision to let you go.
Inky please forgive me as I can’t forgive myself for not doing something sooner. You must have been in incredible pain and you still tried to drag yourself to me. I hope you knew that you were LOVED, and I finally got to give you that pet and kiss even though it was to late. I have to live this guilt and hope can forgive me. I know you and your baby have crossed the rainbow bridge and are happy together, and I hope someday I will see you again. Love, Your Adopted Mom

April 24, 2020
Deb Rothermel