Missy by Tommy / Daddy Tommy

Missy was a dog that we adopted from a military family and she was so wonderful. I have to make this brief because my emotions are taking over me to the point where I cry uncontrollably because I feel so deeply guilty everyday of my life that I put her down in 2004 because she had tumors all over her and a precancerous growth in her mouth and I was mean to her and for that I will always hate myself for it..The day I put her down was one of the worst days of my life!!!! and it stabs my heart like a knife always because in my mind I wanted to keep her alive even though her quality of life would’ve been lousy and I about maxed out a credit card getting her tumors removed but I was mean to her and I don’t think I could ever say I’m sorry enough and don’t think I will ever get over my guilt…I wasn’t mean always, I loved her but I had cancer surgery of my own a few months earlier and I was having marital issues..

I took it out on her and I hate myself for doing it. No one should ever do that to their pets! We should love them always and I guess that’s why I’m writing this to show how sweet Missy was to my family and how ashamed I am still 5 years later after her passing..I can’t stop crying and I don’t know what to do.

Missy, there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t wish you were still here with us and that I want to hold you close to me without crying or feeling any guilt. I miss you so much! oxoxoxoxox

 

With sweet love always,
Missy
Tommy