March 20th 1990 —- July 5th 2001
My sweet dog Pepper who I always called Baby was a
black cocker spaniel (and Labrador) with a white stripe down his chest.
When my dad first brought him home as puppy we thought he was a
full cocker spaniel like his mom.
But he kept growing and growing and we found out the truth!
He had cocker spaniel fur and a lab face–too cute for words.
When we first took him to the Vet we didn’t have a name picked out,
so my mom called him Pepper. It suited him but he was my little baby
so that is what I called him.
I was ten years old when he came into our lives.
My older sister and I had been begging my parents for a dog for
some time so he was the best surprise of my life!
He was a very rambunctious and loving dog.
We almost lost him when he was 6 to the Parvo virus but he made it.
It was a Monday night just last week when I noticed something was
wrong with Baby. He was not eating that much and was wheezing
and coughing. It seemed to subside at night especially after he took
his arthritis pill. But Tuesday it was worse.
I called my mom–he needed the Vet. We couldn’t get him an appointment
until Thursday so that night we took him to the emergency pet center.
He seemed weak and didn’t want to walk. We had to carry him in.
Dr. Murphy told us that it was his heart–it was beating very irregularly.
However he seemed to think we could fix it with lasix injections and
they would give him oxygen therapy to help him breathe.
So we checked Pepper into the hospital. Dr. Murphy called me a 2 A.M.
and told me that they had found a serious problem with the
atrium of his heart.
The next morning his condition had not changed.
That night my parents and I went to go see him in the hospital.
I brought him his favorite toy and he was happy to see us.
He couldn’t stand up and that broke my heart. I felt so bad because
he probably thought we were taking him home.
My mom said we could take Baby home but I said no way.
We have to try something else. It was the Fourth of July.
The lasix didn’t work. They tried three more medicines and kept him
another night–but nothing worked for my sweetie.
My dad and I picked him up early Thursday morning.
He was so weak.
I sat with my poor baby all day. He was struggling to breathe and wouldn’t
eat and had not gone to the bathroom in 3 days.
It was the worst day of my life. To see him like that killed me inside.
I never thought he would be this sick. Every time we took him to the Vet
he got better. I had to call my older sister in Orlando to tell her what was
going to happen. All she could say was “he’s only 11!” “
my poor puppy dog”.
He sat up on the couch with me–and that was a good sign.
He got down–I knew he had to go outside. I helped him.
He was so weak though he couldn’t make it back into the house.
So I sat outside with him for two and a half hours.
He was becoming disoriented. Dr. Murphy said that was due to
lack of oxygen.
He was going to see Dr. Murphy for the last time that night.
By the time my parents got home from work I wanted to take him in.
I could not watch Baby suffer like this anymore.
But he was my baby–how can I let him go?
He was my childhood and about a million wonderful memories all in
one special being.
We drove to the the Vet. I was sitting in the car with him petting Pepper
and telling him how much I loved him. Then we took him inside through
the back door crying. We laid him on the table and Dr. Murphy came in.
He said that he knew this would happen eventually he just hoped it
wouldn’t have been so soon. That is when I started to sob.
He asked if we would like a minute alone with Pepper.
My dad told him I had been with him all day long–so I had my time
to say good-bye and it was really difficult.
So I looked into his innocent eyes and kissed him good-bye.
Then Dr. Murphy put my Baby to sleep.
I’m crying now just writing about it. Then my mom said to him
“No more suffering Pepper”. Then she talked about what a good dog
he was and how we have to remember that he had a good life and lots
of love from a family. Most dogs never get that.
So I spent about an hour with my Baby after he passed away.
I just didn’t want to leave him. I kept thinking he must have been so
worried about us–wondering what was wrong–why were we crying?
And he probably felt so bad that he couldn’t come over and comfort
me like he always does when I am upset. He was just too weak.
Then again maybe he knew. Dr. Murphy was so kind to us and told us
he was so sorry and hugged us when we finally left.
We had him cremated and will bury his ashes next to our cat Starbuck
that died 5 years ago. My mom thought they should be together.
I think our cat LeMew misses Pepper too.
I cried myself to sleep that night. My Baby was not there to sleep in
my room with me anymore. That is all I could think of.
The next day was very difficult too. No one needing to go outside at 6:00 AM
no one there downstairs to greet me in the morning.
My boyfriend sent me “The Rainbow Bridge” poem and it made me cry.
I think I miss him most when I am home alone–because I was never
actually alone when he was there.
Only pet owners who lost their loved one can understand.
I never imaged this sadness. I never thought it would happen.
But now I know Baby is not suffering and he is playing with Bud and
Trudy (my boyfriend’s dogs that passed) and Starbuck too.
He is running like he did when he was a puppy-there is no arthritis
and he is happy again.
No dog will ever replace Pepper.
I am so glad that I had 11 years with him.
I thank him for all of the joy and comfort he brought into
my life and for loving us unconditionally.
I wish that every one could be as lucky as me to
have such a loving and special pet.
I’ll never forget you Baby!
Mandy
| Pepper 'Baby' Rizzo |