In October 1991 I was 17 years old.
I lived in the house I was raised in but my mom and sister
had moved out.
My boyfriend and I drove to a pet store in town.
Six new kittens had just been dropped off and were ready to go.
I watched them all for a while and one little black and grey tabby
with white chest neck and paws stared into my eyes.
I couldn’t look away. I knew that was my boy.
I took him home kept his food in my room so my other three cats
wouldn’t get it. I babied him and he loved me right back.
I decided to call him Wolfgang Amadeus.
His markings were those of the wolf and He responded to
Mozart’s music. When I got expelled from Grade Twelve he was there
and knew I was hurting. When my boyfriend (then fiancee) left me he knew.
I moved to a big city away from home…he came.
I let him out to wander sometimes. One day I got a note in the mailbox.
It said that they took him because he was in their garden.
I put on a frantic search. Newspapers signs on posts a $75 reward.
Many people called each one not him. I began to give up and finally a woman
called saying it was him…right down to his light blue nylon collar.
I finally got him back. I moved back home but this time with my mom.
I never really stayed in one place very long and I couldn’t
always take Wolfy. He stayed at my mom’s a lot.
A great farm for him and many cats and dogs to play with.
This last year I left my husband and moved to another city away from home.
He had always had kidney problems. Never really serious.
I went home last Christmas and saw him. He was a mess.
He could barely move and had a lot of trouble jumping up on my lap.
When I held him he had little moments when he would lurch in pain,
and screech. I got really mad at my mom though I knew that wasn’t
fair because she works full-time and has a farm to run,
with 25 other cats not to mention the other animals.
I had to go back to the city to go to work the next day.
That night I woke up to find that Wolfy had jumped onto my belly
as I lay on my back on the couch. I know that must have hurt him to do.
I can’t describe how glad I am that he did.
My mom called me the next day after taking Wolfy to the vet.
He had a penal blockage and had for quite some time.
They unblocked it and now we’d just have to wait to see what happened.
She called me the next day (December 30th) at work.
“Wolfy’s died last night..he’s gone”. I broke down.
I couldn’t get home to bury him for a few months.
At the end of March when the frost had broken I went down
with Mom to the tree where we buried my dog Tippy a few years earlier.
Mom had kept Wolfy frozen for all that time waiting for me to come home.
I dug the grave and mom opened the bag he was in.
If it was too bad I wouldn’t want to look as it would hurt me
too much and I wanted to remember him as he was not as
a shell of the baby I knew.
Mom told me to look. He just looked like he was sleeping.
I took my jacket off and wrapped him in it.
I cut a piece of his hair and pet him good-bye. I laid him in his bed
and we covered him.
I said a prayer and asked the Goddess to take care of him until
she’s ready to send him back. Maybe we’ll meet again.
I miss my baby my familiar my confidante.
Wolfy?
I miss you and love you. If only I had had my life together and were
able to care for you under my own wing you’d still be here.
I’m so sorry.
See you later dearest,
Mom
| Wolfy |